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08-10-2006 11:33 PM
I have been trying to figure out what all this zoints thing is about and why my good mate Scott (torch crawl) is such an avid believer. First Scott, in the words of my wife...
I believe in Scott...
Second, maybe I need to post some words on this profile about how I feel.... Here goes
Almost 7 years ago I met a woman that changed my life. She changed the way I thouhgt, the way I was... but in the best way. Within 9 months I became a husband and the happiest guy on earth. My wife, Patricia, literally showed my the world. I had lived my life very isolated, the first 14 year was lived in a coal mining town, where I was the picture of innocence. I had never consumed alcohol or even knew what a night-club was. About this time I leant my father was dying of an incurable degenerative disease, which saw our lives truned upside down. We moved to a larger town where I continued my schooling and then went onto drop out of Uni and end up as a Bank Teller.
At 20 I proposed to a girl, she said she had to think and a week later asked me to move out... she had been seeing another guy! Needless to say i was shattered. It took me another 9 years to trust again, and then a Dutch woman changed my life. 6 weeks after meeting she fly to Australia to meet me and we just knew. We knew it was meant to be... we met on the net... but this is a great story of love and haapiness.
She showed me what other places where like, I had never been out of my comfort zone and here I was becoming an international traveller. She tauhgt me how to love again and for that I will be forever in her debt. My love for her simply grows every day as our lives become more and more. I'm not saying things are a bed of roses, infact at times we have fought so much that it hurts. We have two beautiful daughters that I absolutley adore as does my wife. Being a parent must be the hardest most challenging thing i have ever done... fortunatetly it is the most rewarding also.
Next big change happens when we decide to move countries, from Australia to Holland... big move... it was my suggestion. My wife is close to her family and we had always talked about moving, this time we just did it. Now we are here and although hard at times it is life that I am enjoying, it is a new experience almost every day.
Life being married isn't always easy as that though, moving countries is a breeze. Staying married is hard work. I'm not sure what I want to say about marraige or my life, but I do know that if you are maaried to the one you love, it is always worth the effort. The effort you show toward one another the love you show. It need to be there and you need to be friends, you need to be able to talk. I want to be with my wife every waking moment, which is sweet, but not always possible. At the moment I am battling my own fears. I have fears about being in a foreign country, about being a bit over weight and I hate seeing pimples on my face??? I am used to being with my wife and want her with me all the time... I love her. I am facing my own demons though, the jealousy demon.
I seem to get jealous over little things, that just seem stupid and I know I shouldn't, it just happens. Some say jealousy is a curse, that you don't trust your loved one, others say that it means you care??? I know I shouldn't be jealous, but sometimes it just happens... I'm working on my feelings.
That'll do for tonight... I wish everyone well.
Merv